Cards

“

I'd tap that.

”

The cards panel, with a foil card selected.

Cards are a feature that is unlocked by using A Still-Beating Heart, which is a guaranteed drop from The Exile.

Once unlocked, you will receive a card every hour, unless your deck is full. You can also switch on mayo generation to start making them, they are the resources for casting cards. Cards in your deck can be "cast" to gain their bonus, "yeet"ed to be destroyed, or "protect"ed which prevents you from casting or yeeting them. Like inventory items, cards can be protected by SHIFT-clicking them and discarded by CTRL-clicking. Cards disappear after you cast them; the bonus they grant is permanent.

You can change the order of cards in your deck via drag-and-drop. You start with a deck size of 10 cards.

Card types

The following is a list of all card types and the bonus they give per point of mayo at tier 1 with minimum (0.8) to maximum (1.2) rarity.

Card types	Bonus per mayo at tier 1
	Rarity 0.8	Rarity 1.2
Energy NGU Speed (E-NGU)	0.112%	0.154%
Magic NGU Speed (M-NGU)	0.106%	0.15%
Wandoos Speed (WANDOOS)	0.108%	0.152%
Augment Speed (AUGS)	0.108%	0.152%
Time Machine Speed (TM)	0.112%	0.158%
Hack Speed (HACKS)	0.104%	0.146%
Wish Speed (WISHES)	0.104%	0.146%
Attack/Defense Stats (A/D)	6.6%	7.4%
Adventure Stats (ADV)	0.136%	0.178%
Drop Chance (DROPS)	0.112%	0.158%
Gold Drop (GOLD)	0.56%	0.79%
Daycare Speed (DAYCARE)	0.022%	0.03%
PP Gain (PP)	0.028%	0.037%
QP Gain (QP)	0.027%	0.036%
End	N/A	N/A

Card stats

In the center of each card is the type of bonus it gives and the percentage boost it will grant if cast.

Mayo cost

A rare example of a card with six different mayo types

On the right side of the card is its mayo cost (1 to 9 mayo spread across 1 to 6 types, randomly chosen). The boost effect of a card scales linearly with its mayo cost. In the small view of the card, the total mayo cost is shown in the upper right.

Tiers

Each card has a tier, printed in the upper left, which influences how large a bonus it grants. All card types (HACKS, PP, A/D, etc.) start at tier 1; the tier of specific card types can be increased via Perks, Quirks, or Wishes. This increases the tier of any future drops of that card type. As of build 1.220, your current tier for all card types can be viewed on the Tag Panel. Regular Black Pens (which can be bought from 4G's Sellout Shop) will give +2 tiers on the next 25 cards dropped of any type. Regular Black Pens will get used automatically, as soon as purchased. Unlike other items, this will NOT have a 'Use' button.

Rarity

At the bottom of the card is its rarity, ranging from "Crappy" to "Hot Damn". This indicates the range of the rarity value multiplier which generated the card's effect value. Each card is created with a randomised rarity value between 0.80 and 1.20, with the low end increased to 0.85 with the Disco Set Bonus. Half of this range is covered by the "Crappy" and "Bad" ratings (0.80 – 1.00); all ratings "Meh" and above indicate a better-than-average multipler (1.00 – 1.20).

Crappy	0.80 – 0.90 (0.85 – 0.90 with Disco set)
Bad	0.90 – 1.00
Meh	1.00 – 1.08
Okay	1.08 – 1.14
Good	1.14 – 1.17
Great	1.17 – 1.19
Hot Damn	1.19 – 1.20

Mayo

At the bottom left of the cards panel is a Mayo subpanel. This displays the amount of each type of mayo you have (Angry, Sad, Moldy, Ayy Lmayo, Cinco de Mayo, and Pretty), your progress towards each next mayo point, and which Mayo Generators are active. You start with one Mayo Generator; additional ones can be bought with Perks, Quirks, Wishes, or the Sellout Shop.

Having more than one Mayo Generator active splits your total mayo generation across each active type. With two generators active, it would take two hours (at base speed) to get one point of mayo from each generator, although you would be generating two types simultaneously.

Small amounts of mayo (which are added to your Generator progress bars) can also be gained by eating fruits corresponding to the six mayo types. These fruits are affected by Poop and mayo speed bonuses, but none of the other things that normally affect Yggdrasil. You also gain some mayo each time you discard a card if you have the Card Recycling: Mayo Quirk.

Tags

Each card type has an equal chance of being spawned, unless you use the Tag Panel to increase the likelihood of specific cards being spawned. One tag each can be gained via Quirks, Wishes, and the Sellout Shop.

The base tag effect is 10%, which sounds low, but actually makes a big difference. The chance of any card type dropping is normally 1 in 14 (7.14%). Slightly less than your tag effect is added to this, so if you have one tag active with an effect of 10%, your chance of getting that card type is just under 17%. If you have four tags active, your chance of getting any of the tagged types is 57.14%, twice what it would normally be (28.57%). With a maximum tag effect of 16.5%, a single tagged type has a 22.46% chance of spawning, and with four tags selected, your chance is 75.71% for one of those types.

The tag formula is:

$\mathrm{NumberOfTags} \times \mathrm{TagEffect} + (1 - \mathrm{NumberOfTags} \times \mathrm{TagEffect}) \times \mathrm{NumberOfTags} \div 14$

This represents the total chance of getting any of your tagged card types.

Tags have no effect on card tiers or rarity.

Card bonus formula

There are four constants associated with each card type (C1, C2, C3, C4) which combine with rarity (R), tier (T), and mayo (M) according to this formula:

$(C1 + (C2 \times R \times T^{C3} \times C4^{T})) \times ({M} \div 100)$

These are each card type's four constants:

Card Type	C1	C2	C3	C4
E-NGU	0.03	0.1	1.2	1.03
M-NGU	0.02	0.1	0.8	1.08
WANDOOS	0.02	0.1	0.8	1.1
AUGS	0.02	0.1	0.8	1.1
TM	0.02	0.1	0.8	1.15
HACKS	0.02	0.1	0.4	1.05
WISHES	0.02	0.1	0.5	1.05
A/D	5	1	1.5	2
ADV	0.05	0.1	0.4	1.07
DROPS	0.02	0.1	1	1.15
GOLD	0.1	0.5	0.8	1.15
DAYCARE	0.005	0.02	0.4	1.04
PP	0.01	0.02	0.6	1.11
QP	0.01	0.02	0.6	1.08

The following table shows how much the card bonus is increased by each successive tier for each card type, as a multiplier. The figures given are for a card having 1.0 rarity (Meh); higher or lower rarities only influence the relative tier bonus by a few percent, even across all tiers.

Tier	1→2	2→3	3→4	4→5	5→6	6→7	7→8	8→9	9→10	10→11	11→12	12→13	13→14	14→15	15→16	16→17	17→18	18→19	TOTAL	TOTAL(pen)
E-NGU	2.10	1.61	1.43	1.33	1.27	1.23	1.20	1.18	1.17	1.15	1.14	1.13	1.12	1.12	1.11	1.11	1.10	1.10	38.88	47.10
M-NGU	1.76	1.46	1.34	1.28	1.24	1.22	1.20	1.18	1.17	1.16	1.16	1.15	1.14	1.14	1.14	1.13	1.13	1.13	28.76	36.63
WANDOOS	1.79	1.48	1.37	1.30	1.27	1.24	1.22	1.21	1.19	1.19	1.18	1.17	1.17	1.16	1.16	1.15	1.15	1.15	38.62	51.04
AUGS	1.79	1.48	1.37	1.30	1.27	1.24	1.22	1.21	1.19	1.19	1.18	1.17	1.17	1.16	1.16	1.15	1.15	1.15	38.62	51.04
TM	1.87	1.55	1.43	1.36	1.32	1.30	1.28	1.26	1.25	1.24	1.23	1.23	1.22	1.21	1.21	1.21	1.20	1.20	78.71	113.73
HACKS	1.33	1.21	1.16	1.14	1.12	1.11	1.10	1.10	1.09	1.09	1.08	1.08	1.08	1.08	1.08	1.07	1.07	1.07	5.99	6.88
WISHES	1.42	1.26	1.20	1.16	1.14	1.13	1.12	1.11	1.10	1.10	1.09	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	3.96	5.25
A/D	2.51	2.95	2.89	2.74	2.61	2.51	2.44	2.39	2.34	2.31	2.28	2.26	2.24	2.22	2.20	2.19	2.18	2.17	1,489,817.36	7,041,251.99
ADV	1.29	1.20	1.16	1.14	1.13	1.12	1.11	1.11	1.11	1.10	1.10	1.10	1.10	1.09	1.09	1.09	1.09	1.09	6.79	8.08
DROPS	2.14	1.68	1.51	1.43	1.37	1.34	1.31	1.29	1.28	1.26	1.25	1.25	1.24	1.23	1.23	1.22	1.22	1.21	139.07	205.50
GOLD	1.87	1.55	1.43	1.36	1.32	1.30	1.28	1.26	1.25	1.24	1.23	1.23	1.22	1.21	1.21	1.21	1.20	1.20	78.45	113.35
DAYCARE	1.31	1.19	1.15	1.12	1.11	1.10	1.09	1.08	1.08	1.08	1.07	1.07	1.07	1.07	1.06	1.06	1.06	1.06	4.98	5.61
PP	1.50	1.34	1.28	1.24	1.22	1.20	1.19	1.18	1.17	1.17	1.16	1.16	1.16	1.15	1.15	1.15	-	-	16.19	21.41
QP	1.46	1.31	1.24	1.21	1.18	1.17	1.16	1.15	1.14	1.14	1.13	1.13	1.12	1.12	-	-	-	-	8.75	11.04

Foil Cards

“	card shiny me like shiny	”
–4G

On rare occasion (~1% of the time), a card will drop with a gold-coloured background and border. These cards have no special properties; they are merely a reference to rare "foil" type cards sometimes included in trading card game packs.[1]

Big Chonkers

After purchasing the "BIG CHONKER CARDS" Sadistic-mode quirk, the game will spawn a "Big Chonker" card every 72 hours, reduced by card generation bonuses. Chonkers have a card type like all other cards, the generation of which is influenced by what tags you have selected, and are generated with the same tier as any other card of that type. However, instead of having between 1 and 9 mayo casting cost, Chonkers need between 21 and 29 mayo. Their rarity is always 1.2, the maximum possible. Chonkers always spawn in protected status.

End Card

In SADISTIC difficulty there is a random chance (~1%) of spawning an End card alongside any normal card. The mayo cost of any End card is 99 of each of the six types of mayo. Once cast, it grants one of the pieces of THE END.

Additional End cards will continue to spawn throughout SADISTIC, allowing you to recast an End card to replace a trashed THE END piece. If you have the Card Recycling Perk and/or Quirk, you can yeet End cards for a 10% advance to the regular card spawn timer and/or 20% random mayo progress.

Recommendations

The most important card types are, arguably, adventure stats, hack speed, and wish speed. Improve your tier levels for these card types and keep them tagged.

The adventure boost you can get from cards will greatly shorten the amount of time you will spend waiting to defeat The Exile v4 so you can enter Sadistic mode, and will speed your way through the Sadistic adventure zones as well.

Hack speed and wish speed are also valuable late-game, and there are only a few ways to improve them, so cards come in handy. By mid-Sadistic, though, the returns from hacks and wishes are meager, so it's time to focus on something else.

Other possibilities:

• Daycare – every little bit helps, although the daycare speed bonus from cards is stingy even at higher tiers and daycare becomes unimportant once you have transformed a maxed Ascended x9 Pendant and LootzLrtozlOtZlOtTlooTTLoooLLLTTTToTlOOt for THE END pieces, and have another one maxed.
• Energy and Magic NGU – Sadistic NGUs start out very slow but also provide big bonuses early on. Higher-tier E-NGU and M-NGU cards give very good boosts to NGU progress.
• Drop rates are poor once you hit Sadistic, so focusing a bit on Drop Chance will speed your sniping/grinding progress. The bonus from Drop Chance cards is especially good at higher tiers.
• PP and QP – the cost of perks and quirks gets quite high by the endgame, although they remain an important source of advancement as hacks, wishes, and NGUs plateau. Hold off on casting PP and QP cards until you can get them up to at least tier 6 or so.

Every other stat is easy to gain via means other than cards, or is not very important to late-game progress.

Cards upgrades

There are several upgrades that improve different aspects of Cards:

• Sadistic Basic Challenges
• Sadistic Troll Challenge 5 and 6

4G's Sellout Shop

Name	Effect	Price (AP)
Extra Deck Size!	+1 Max Deck Size, up to 50.	25,000
Mayo Generator	+1 Mayo Generator, up to 2.	250,000
Extra Tag Slot!	+1 Tag Slot.	250,000
Mayo Infuser (consumable item)	Doubles Mayo generation speed for 24 hours.	40,000
Regular Black Pens (consumable item)	Increases cards tier by 2, used automatically.	40,000 for 25

Perks

Name	Effect	Price (PP)	Levels	Difficulty
Card Recycling: Card Spawn	Advances card spawn timer by 10% your card time per yeeted card (or Big Chonker timer by 25% of your Chonker time per yeeted Chonker).	3 M (3E+6)	1	Sadistic

Quirks

Name	Effect	Price (QP)	Levels	Difficulty
BIG CHONKER CARDS	Causes "Big Chonkers" to spawn with a base time of 3 days.	38,888	1	Sadistic
Card Recycling: Mayo	Gain 20% mayo progress on one mayo type randomly selected from mayo types on the yeeted card.	40,000	1	Sadistic

Wishes

Name	Effect	Levels	Total Wish output	Difficulty
I wish I had BEEFY Cards I	Raise the maximum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	1	4 Sp (4E24)	Sadistic
I wish I didn't have WIMPY Cards I	Raise the minimum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	1	4 Sp (4E24)	Sadistic
I wish I had BEEFY Cards II	Raise the maximum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	1	100 Sp (1E26)	Sadistic
I wish I didn't have WIMPY Cards II	Raise the minimum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	1	100 Sp (1E26)	Sadistic
I wish I had BEEFY Cards III	Raise the maximum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	2	1.14 Oc (1.14E27)	Sadistic
I wish I didn't have WIMPY Cards III	Raise the minimum mayo cost of regular cards by 1 per level.	2	1.05 Oc (1.05E27)	Sadistic
I wish my chonkers were CHONKIER	Raise the maximum mayo cost of Big Chonker cards by 1 per level.	5	5.1 Oc (5.1E27)	Sadistic
I wish my chonkers were LESS NOT CHONKIER	Raise the minimum mayo cost of Big Chonker cards by 1 per level.	5	5.55 Oc (5.55E27)	Sadistic

Items

6% Mayo and Card Generation Speed.

Item	Effect	Source
Still-Beating Heart Set	+1% Tag Effect.	Drops by The Exile
Rad Set	+5 Max Deck Size.	Drops from The Rad-Lands
Disco Set	Raises the minimum rarity of crappy cards to 0.85.	Drops from That 70's Zone
Rock Set	+1 tier to all cards.	Drops by ROCK LOBSTER
Duck Set	+6% Mayo and Card Generation Speed.	Drops from DUCK DUCK ZONE
Amalgamate Set	+10 Max Deck size.	Drops by AMALGAMATE
Rainbow Heart Set	+10% Mayo and Card Generation Speed.	4G's Sellout Shop

Tier ups

• Perks: +3 tiers per card type except PP
• Quirks: +5 tiers per card type except QP
• Wishes: +7 tiers per card type except Wishes, an extra +1 tier for PP and QP
• Rock (set) completion bonus: +1 tier to all cards
  • Total: 10 for Wishes, 13 for QP, 15 for PP, 17 for all else.
• Regular Black Pens: +2 tiers for the next 25 cards [Will get used automatically. Unlike other items, this will NOT have a 'Use' button.]
  • Total: 12 for Wishes, 15 for QP, 17 for PP, 19 for all else.

Faster card generation speed

• 4 perks, totaling x1.1585 (=1.05*1.04*1.03²)
• 4 quirks, totaling x1.1585 (=1.05*1.04*1.03²)
• 6 wishes, totaling x1.2291 (=1.05*1.04*1.03⁴)
• Rainbow Heart (set): x1.10
• Duck (set): x1.06
• Sadistic Troll Challenge: x1.10
  • Total: X2.1157

Faster mayo generation speed

• 4 perks, totaling x1.1585 (=1.05*1.04*1.03²)
• 4 quirks, totaling x1.1585 (=1.05*1.04*1.03²)
• 6 wishes, totaling x1.2291 (=1.05*1.04*1.03⁴)
• 5 extra mayo generators, totaling x1.10
• Rainbow Heart (set): x1.10
• Duck (set): x1.06
• Sadistic Troll Challenge: x1.10
  • Total: x2.3273
• Mayo Infusers: x2, or x2.2 with Blue Heart Set
  • Total: x4.6546, or x5.1200 with Blue Heart Set

Bigger deck size

• 15 from 3 perks
• 15 from 3 quirks
• 15 from 3 wishes
• 50 from 4G's Sellout Shop
• 5 from Rad (set)
• 10 from Amalgamate (set)
  • Total: 120

Extra mayo generators

• 1 perk
• 1 quirk
• 1 wish
• 2 from 4G's Sellout Shop
  • Total: 6

Extra tag slot

• 1 quirk
• 1 wish
• 1 from 4G's Sellout Shop
  • Total: 4

Better tags

• 4 perks, totaling +1.7% tag effect
• 4 quirks, totaling +1.7% tag effect
• 5 wishes, totaling +2.1% tag effect
  • Total: 16.5%

Tools

Sancdar has created a spreadsheet that allows one to simulate gain rates for different card values and quirk/perk/wish bonuses. Good luck figuring out how to use it.

• Sancdar's Kongregate thread
• Cards spreadsheet on Google Docs

Charts

The following charts are Tier (1-17) by % per Mayo for the range of possible rarities (0.8-1.2). It may help determine how useful it is to tier up a particular card type. Note that A/D is in both logarithmic and non-logarithmic scales to show the detail and scale.